Having spent more than a few months in China I can tell you I’m already past the romantic stage of our relationship and on to complaining about who’s going to do the dishes next, no I’m not talking about my dearest Yakun I’m talking about my romantic view of China as it was, but it’s not completely faded.
You've probably noticed that you’re being stared at, and you’re told it’s the curious nature of Chinese people, it shouldn't bother you… But it does, at least when they stare for longer than a period of five minutes while your trying to slurp down that hot bowl of 面条 (miàn tiáo) flour noodles.
Being an uncommon sight it doesn’t help that I also have a local girlfriend, which can promote angry stares from what I presume to be lonely men. I guess it can’t be helped but I want to make the situation more enjoyable for the both of us by poking fun at it, so today I learned a few words to do just that.
What are you looking at?
kàn nǐ gè tóu?
Why are you staring? Is there a flower on my face?
kàn shén me kàn, wǒ liǎn shàng yǒu huār á?
The English translation may sound cute, but saying this to a stranger is rude, depending on your tone of voice you could get away with this one but I wouldn’t 除非你有种 (chú fēi nǐ yǒu zhǒng ) unless you have the balls.
I finally settled on using this one-liner so I could get back to my meal with out feeling like a jerk.
Can I help you? -or- Do you need something?
yǒu shì ma?
saying this with a kind and humorous demeanor should get you back to a peaceful meal.
Just to cover my self, don't go around using the first two of these carelessly. There, I'm covered!